How I experienced my higher Self after a near-death experience.

A near-fatal car wreck changed my life after an NDE, yet I wouldn't trade it for anything.

After I recovered from my third abdominal surgery as a result of a near-fatal car wreck in Baja, Mexico in 2017, I was taken back to my room in the trauma/medical-surgical unit. After I’d slept a few hours, my trauma surgeon, Dr. Kill (real name), and his entourage of two trauma nurses came in and woke me up.

“You need another surgery tomorrow morning,” Dr. Kill informed me and my husband, John, a recently retired emergency medicine physician.

“The infection is located in a challenging area next to the ileocecal valve that separates the small and large intestines. We may have to remove that valve.”

I nodded and smiled at Dr. Kill, happy to see him again. Whatever was happening was fine with me.

During my surgery, when I was unconscious, I became aware I was in a black void between worlds. A voice that was not my own said telepathically,

“You get to choose how you go through this experience. What will you choose?”

In my mind, I thought,

I don’t want to be a victim, so I’ll take the high road and use love and gratitude to heal.

I knew I’d a spiritual experience, but I wasn’t sure what it was. But it gave me hope I could recover if I used love and gratitude to heal, which I did.

As Dr. Kill and the nurses walked out of my room, I looked down at my hospital bed with its orange bedspread and noticed something unusual. The bed seemed longer from the way I saw it before the surgery.

I looked up at John across the room near the windows. It felt like I was looking through my eyes, but not as me, but as a spirit looking out of my eyes.

I was in pure peace. The “I” who was me was different. It felt like “I” was a spirit looking out of my eyes from a different reality.

I saw that John had started to cry. I looked at him in confusion, wondering what was wrong.

“Why are you crying,” I asked.

“I don't want you to suffer anymore,” he said. “You’ve suffered a lot.”

“I’m not suffering,” I gently said, “You’re suffering.”

Bursting into tears, he came over and knelt next to my bed, put his head down and sobbed. Stroking his hair, I said,

“Everything is going to be ok.”

I couldn’t understand why he was so upset when I was at peace. It felt like I was in a spiritual realm, a place I’d never been before. I felt like an angel had touched me. My energy was elevated. Everything was perfect and happening precisely as it should. I was in acceptance.

I didn’t understand what had happened to me during surgery, but I knew I had undergone an experience that left me a changed person. I felt a sense of higher energy, consciousness, and unconditional love beyond anything I’d ever experienced.

I wondered if my care providers would notice.

It turns out they did because a CNA, who had assisted me for most of the six weeks I’d spent in the hospital, mentioned to me during one of my final weeks,

“I know you have to go, but I don’t want you to go,” she said. She was a single mother with two young children who were cared for by her father. I gave her hope that everything would work out for her.

A pulmonologist assigned to my case visited me twice after my procedures, which left Dr. Kill wondering why he continued to stop by. But I understood it was because my energy had changed, and he could feel that.

After I returned home, I bought every book I could find on NDEs by Dr. Brian Weiss and Dr. Raymond Moody. I realized I’d had a near-death experience (NDE).

During the next four months, I was in peace and unconditional love. There were no negative thoughts in my head. This felt like the opposite of how I usually felt because I’ve always had anxiety.

My concussion slowed me down as I began to get back into my business after four months so I could take care of things that needed my attention. However, my brain hurt from reviewing numbers and refunding clients who had prepaid for coaching.

Slowly, my ego returned online again as I tried to organize my business to ensure things were settled. My experience with awakening is that it comes and goes. It’s not lasting.

Your higher Self represents the aspect of your being free from ego.

The non-physical part of you—often called the soul or spirit—connects to the greater cosmic or universal whole.

How to access your higher Self

Connecting with your higher self begins with recognizing that the answers you seek already reside within you.

Without this belief, it becomes challenging to access one's true nature. We tend to look outside of ourselves for the answers—to a guru, a program, or self-help books.

Ask the God of your understanding for answers. Pray and ask for direction.

Meditate daily to develop mindfulness. I use the Calm app or other options like Insight Timer.

Focus on your breath as a tool for grounding yourself and connecting to your higher Self. Across various traditions, including Judaism and Christianity, breath is often seen as a divine gift—the essence of life—linking us to our soul and higher nature.

How I’ve changed after integrating what I experienced since the accident and NDE:

1. I’m not afraid of death.

2. I now live my life to the fullest; before, I was afraid to live fully.

3. I have a meaningful life with more purpose than before.

4. I have less interest in material things and more interest in life experiences.

5. I was a workaholic before the accident. Now, I no longer need to prove myself.

6. I have a rich inner life and know that what I want is always outside of myself, but what I need is always inside myself.

7. The last chapter of my life is about serving others through my daily interactions and my work.

8. Love and gratitude are the through lines of my life now.

* * *

COMING Feb. 23 - Sunday Salons with Sherold

If you’re interested in working with me, you can join my paid annual Substack subscription for $50 and you get my Sunday Salons with Sherold at no charge.

February Sunday Salon with Sherold

Your Body is Innocent - February 23, 2025

Your body is your temple in this lifetime. You are a spiritual being having a human experience on earth. Your mind—the ego—attacks your body. We’ll use inquiry to learn about your relationship with your body. You’ll forgive yourself and your body.

Sunday, February 23 | 1 - 2 pm PST | 4-5 pm EST

February online workshop FREE for paid subscribers.

Registration link for non-subscribers: $49

*For $50, you can become an annual subscriber and attend all Sunday Salons for free for 2025.

P.S. If you’re interested in coaching, I offer my returning clients a special short-term package. If you’re new to coaching, I provide a nine-session package. Please email me at sherold@sheroldbarr.com for more information.